Topics of Conversation

Most of the good discussions I've taken part in have happened at the table with my host family. Every once in awhile, they're funny, sad, political, etc. I'll share whenever we get a good one.

Today's topic: dating. Complicated? Yes. But let's see if I can explain it. Dating is different in Chile, that's for sure. I'll try to explain it in stages.

Stage 1: Rejection. There's no colloquial Spanish for this one. The basic chronology is guy meets girl, guy gets girl's number, and guy proceeds to call girl until girl decides to pick up. I'm told this can last anywhere from 3 calls to 10 or more. If the girl really isn't interested, the guy will eventually get the picture. If she is interested, she'll pick up when she feels like it. Personally, I can't handle that much rejection. I guess I wouldn't even make it past this stage...

Stage 2: "Andando" - Literally, it means "walking" but I can best describe it as "friends with benefits." I guess it's like casual dating - nothing exclusive has been established. The guy can still check out girls on the street, the girl can still give other guys her number, but they're still thinking about dating. People in this category are frequently seen making out in all manners of public places - parks, Metro stations, buses. The more crowded, the better. Maybe it's a chauvinistic thing, but most people think it's just because Chileans live with their parents for so long that they need to express their physical affection somewhere. Some couples are just more expressive than others...

Stage 3: "Pololear" - This is a serious chilenismo. I had never heard of this word before coming here. I think it means exclusive dating, but I'm really not even sure yet. I guess it's a case-by-case basis, but it's a step and more beyond "andar." If you are in this stage, you have a pololo or polola.

Stage 4: "Novios" - The date has been set if you're in this stage. That's why I'm confused about the previous stage. A lot of ground has been covered between the two.

After this, it's on to bigger and better things. I think you can all catch the drift. However, there's kind of a darker side to this next stage. Women between the ages of 25 and 35 have a really hard time finding a job. There are no discrimination or sexual harassment laws in Chile, so most companies just won't hire women of this age - expecting them to start families and not wanting to pay maternity leave. It makes it even harder for couples to start out.

This is random, but I'm still trying to figure out classes. I'll send out an update on what classes I'm taking next week. I'm not traveling this weekend either, so sorry if this is boring! I'll travel next week and in September though!

I hope everyone is staying cool!

Chao,
Mike